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GODWIN: Well, in that situation, I chose to do something we in the music business like to call: "Lying Through our Teeth". JACK: YOU TOLD ME NOBODY WOULD EVER GET TIRED OF THAT CATCHPHRASE! YOU SAID IT WOULD MAKE ME THE ANIME EQUIVALENT OF THE FONZ! GODWIN: Yes, Jack, but the problem that strikes me here is that you’ve been using it for well over a year now, and people are kind of getting sick of it. JACK: ESPECIALLY WHEN IT'S COMPLETELY INAPPROPRIATE! JACK: YOU MEAN, ( cut to different shot of Jack's face) CARD GAMES ON MOTOR. You see Jack, there’s a problem with your catchphrase. And that’s what I’m here to talk to you about. It doesn’t matter how talented you are, so long as people want to buy your merchandise. ( Cut to Jack singing MMMBop by Hanson off-key while riding his motorcycle around a track)
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( TV explodes predictably, cut to shot of Yusei) JACK ( on TV): TESTING, TESTING, ONE TWO THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!! ( Cut to upset Akiza while the TV is heard in the background)ĪNNOUNCER ( talking over the shot of Akiza and a subsequent shot of Tank, Nerve and Blitz watching TV): And now, ladies and gentlemen, I give you the man who has ruined all other men for you, Jack Atlas! YUSEI ( cutting her off again): Talking about the bike. Long.ĪKIZA: Oh, Yusei, I thought you’d never say something so. These days, I just wanna spend my time riding my girlfriend. RALLY: Come on, Yusei, sing one of your songs. Me, Jack, Crow and Kiryu, we all went our separate ways. YUSEI: Because none of us got laid! Nobody wanted to sleep with us because they were too busy burning to death. YUSEI: The strange part is that the microphone wasn’t even plugged in. ( The city explodes in a column of flame and is viewed from space) JACK: OKAY! TESTING, TESTING, ONE TWO THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!! Testing, testing, one two three! Jack, you wanna check your mic? But then, we experienced some."technical difficulties". YUSEI: One night, we were set to perform in front of the entire world. We were best friends, and even better musicians. We wanted to have the gayest band name in the world, but unfortunately Coldplay was already taken. YUSEI: It’s a long and awesome story, little one. RALLY: How come you never hang out with Jack anymore, Yusei? YUSEI: ( interrupting) I was talking about my bike. YUSEI: I have better things to do than watch that guy, like make out with my girlfriend.ĪKIZA: Oh, Yusei, that’s so sweet of you to say. TAKA: Hey, Yusei, Jack’s making an ass of himself on TV again. ( Cut to Yusei’s hideout, where Yusei and his friends are all watching Jack on TV) THAT IS THE QUESTION!ĬHEERLEADERS: ( sounding something like Tea) Hamlet! Hamlet! He’s our man! If he can’t do it, no one can! JACK ( constantly shouting): TO BE, OR NOT TO BE, ON A MOTORCYCLE. pyrotechnics go off and Jack Atlas appears, riding his Duel Runner/motorcycle)ĪNNOUNCER: ( off-screen) Ladies and gentlemen, may I present, in his one man production of “ Hamlet on Motorcycles”, Jack Atlas! ( shots of New Domino City at night with the following subtitles)
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